Saturday, June 2, 2012

JUST KEEP SWIMMING



JUST....KEEP....SWIMMING!  I use that line a great deal of the time when I find I need to call in courage or fortitude in several areas of my life.   Now, thinking just how knee deep time we are in the trying to conceive, I find needed some quick way of staying connected to that courageous part of myself.  I have always been one to use mantras and affirmations to push me through the fear and uncertainties of life.
But wasn’t until I saw the movie Neemo, that I incorporated “Just keep swimming” as one of my favorites. The other gift that Ellen Degeneres’ Dory gave me was that gift of childlike wonder and joy. Looking back now the joyfulness of life seems to be run over and smashed to a pancake during our current TTC (trying to conceive) phase.  The numerous Dr. appointments, procedures, lab tests, pills, temperature taking, calendar recording, and not to mention the financial burden are... at times too heavy a load for even my broad shoulders to carry.  
Currently, we have gotten our "GREEN LIGHT" to proceed with our fertility journey.  My post-op check yesterday was a real "eye opener" as the Dr. went over what our journey would truly entail fro this moment on.  We will begin Prometrium at even higher doses that we have experienced in previous times. This will hopefully induce a menstrual cycle allowing us to start Clomid on day 5.  Clomid is the fertility drug used to initiate ovulation since my body lacks the ability to do it on its own.  If all works accordingly to plan, then around 2 weeks after Clomid, the utilization of ovulation kits will ensue. In addition, we have daily temperature checks and a calendar to record this entire process.  Around four weeks after ovulation, there are several outcomes that could occur:  I have a period (that may occur with or without ovulation), I don't have a period but am NOT pregnant, or we GET pregnant.  Depending on the results, our next course of action will then be determined.  We were given th option to do an interuterine insemination up-front if we so choose, which we are still praying.  I do appreciate the type of Dr. we have to go through this process with us.  He allows us to be the captain of our own ship and presents us with many options.  He openly recognizes the physical, emotional, and financial burdens placed upon us.  He goal is to help is achieve our dream of becoming parents and not become concentrated so much on the medical aspect of things. 
 So Let the Fun begin!!!! Not really.  We have heard all the "horror" stories about the side effects of Clomid.  We would be lying if we said we were not somewhat concerned.  This is when true faith and courage come in.  2 Chronicles 15:7 states. "But as for you, be strong and courageous, for your work will be rewarded " (New Living Translation).  We remain firm that God will bless us with not just one child but many at HIS appointed time.  For we are not the captains of this ship, but it is HE that directs our path.  
So for this posting I would like to ask you to do some homework.
It’s simple, you just need to be open and aware and ask yourself a questions:

How do you stay connected to your courage or fortitude?
Dr. Robert Kiltz of CNY Fertility and Healing Arts Center is frequently heard saying, “we’re just going to keep at it” a sentiment that is echo through “Just keep swimming.”
For us we would say, “We're just going to keep praying until something happens” And making sure we put the “correct something” out into the universe. By this I mean making sure that we hold onto the positive thoughts of being a parents and release the fear of “this cycle not working.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Patience and fortitude conquer all things.” The trick is to create a system of connecting or calling in these gifts. If you don’t have a practice of doing so you could begin by taking a moment in the morning, driving in the car or before your start your day by simply saying, “Patience and fortitude or courage please be with us today as we create our family.”
Remembering our words are more powerful than we know and just keep swimming!


2 comments:

  1. Would it be safer, and cheaper in the long run to do the insemination now, rather than attempt these drugs? I know this way though you guys have more control which helps as well.
    Good luck guys!

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  2. Unfortunately the answer to that question is no. In order to do the IUI (insemination), I have to be ovulating which I don't do on my own. So regardless if we chose to just do it now or wait, we still put out money on the medications.

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